MTV Cribs – Charlotte Edition

In honor of living in my apartment for almost a year, I think it’s time for a tour!

In case you’ve missed the previous installments, we had the Raleigh edition and the Extended Stay America edition or MTV Cribs. Completing the trifecta – until I get all willy nilly and move again – is my apartment in Charlotte.

“In case of emergency, the exits are here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here anywhere! Keep your hands and arms inside the carpet! We’re outta here!”

2107 Door

Abandon all hope, ye who enter here

[Cue ominous creeeeeeeeeek]

2107 Entry Before     2107 Entry After

I wanted to do some fancy HTML tags so you could hover over each picture to see the before – the day I picked up the keys – and after – the impromptu photo shoot last night – shots. But because I’m still on wordpress.com instead of wordpress.org, you get side-by-side pictures instead.

2107 Laudry Before     2107 Laundry After

In the before shot, you can clearly see I’m still rolling at “Baller Status” with valet trash. In the after shot, the laundry room now doubles as my Dyson’s parking spot.

And on a side note, it took me seeing these pictures to realize I’m missing a fire extinguisher. Absolutely no idea where it would have gone or when anyone would have come in the apartment to get with since Harper roams the apartment loose. That’s weird.

2107 Living Room Before     2107 Living Room After

Welcome to the living room. Blending in nicely to the entertainment center would be Harper, her laser eyes, and her tongue.

2107 Porch Storage     2107 Porch Door

No need for before and after shots here. I’m not grown-up enough to own outdoor furniture for my tiny patio/porch. The first door is storage. The second is back into the apartment.

2107 Dining Before     2107 Dining After

One addition from the Raleigh apartment is a fancy purple pillow to accompany the two orange ones. Since Harper isn’t allowed on the couch, it’s patrolled by my guard tiger. Also, what was once my brother and sister in law’s table and chairs I was holding for them has suddenly become mine, I think. Their dining room in the new house is much too big for that set. Also, I still don’t eat at the table.

2107 Pictures Africa     2107 Pictures Alaska 2107 Pictures America

The Africa frame is over my desk. The Alaska frame is over the dining table. The rest are all from my cross-country trip and are over my couch. I mainly added these so I could show off my two new picture frames I found at Michaels that match. I’m quickly developing an unhealthy obsession with collage picture frames.

2107 Kitchen Before     2107 Kitchen After2107 Entertainment Nirvana

Another angle from the living room. And the picture that contains everything that encompasses my free time: books, TV, Xbox, and Clemson/college football. Also Momma, you’ll be proud to know I finally found a spot for my Woot lights.

2107 Hall Before     2107 Hall After

Nothing exciting here as far as I can tell. Except that I learned how to lower the toilet seat in the last year.

2107 Counter Before     2107 Counter After

The awkward space every apartment seems to have. The counter’s too high for the chairs yet too low for normal bar stools. It’s the perfect size for plain, wooden stools which are extremely comfortable to sit on and practical for eating full meals on. Stupid apartment architects. So now, it holds my wireless printer, a couple of baseball bats, the walking stick from my dad, and a stolen Clemson cafeteria tray.

2107 Dishwasher Before     2107 Dishwasher After

Riveting kitchen action shots.

2107 Stove Before     2107 Stove After

Raleigh’s kitchen was too big with too much cabinet space. Charlotte’s kitchen is too small with hardly any cabinet space for food. And draws that are too narrow to hold my silverware container. On the plus side, I’m still eating kid cereal and drinking hot chocolate with mini marshmallows.

2107 Sink Before     2107 Sink After

The signs are from my stop at Alcatraz. The one by the sink says “Regulation #5 – You are entitled to food, clothing, shelter, and medical attention. Anything else that you get is a privilege.” The one by my computer says “Regulation #20 – As a general rule, you will work eight hours a day, five days a week, with Saturdays, Sundays, and Holidays devoted to recreation.”

2107 Fridge Before     2107 Fridge After

What’s an episode of Cribs without a peek into the refrigerator? Charlotte’s sporting a much healthier selection than Raleigh did. Yogurt, eggs, plums, strawberries, spinach, and grapes in the fridge. Alaskan king crab legs, Alaskan halibut, ice cream, biscuits, and tater tots (Don’t be so jealous…) in the freezer.

2107 Nook Before     2107 Nook After

I hate the “computer nook” all apartments seem to have now. I love the shelves though. My Clemson shrine isn’t nearly as strong as it was in Raleigh. But I do have more room to show off my “I’m so vain my license plate has my name on it” side. And my thousands of dollars worth of DVDs (left side) and video games (right side). My bachelor-forever investment strategy is fierce!

2107 Tub Before     2107 Tub After

This is where I’m naked every morning.

Now you’re thinking about me naked.

My job is done here.

2107 Linen Before     2107 Linen After

In case you haven’t noticed the theme, the only difference between the before and after pictures is basically “add more orange.” P.S. Are linen closets really necessary in one bedroom apartments?

2107 Bathroom Before     2107 Bathroom After

Young professional in work clothes with the toilet lid up. Or deuces-throwing bum in a band t-shirt with the toilet lid down. You choose.

The line starts here, ladies.

The trashcan is on top of the toilet because Harper loves to eat q-tips. Disgusting.

2107 Bedroom Before     2107 Bedroom After

2107 Bedroom Bonus

My bedroom’s finally big enough for both night stands. And I now have a headboard! If it’s not obvious enough, my room’s surrounded by my Anderson Design Group posters from places I’ve been. The only reason I don’t have more is because I’ve run out of room to hang them all. I’ve got seven on the walls and three under the bed for when I get more wall space.

2107 Bedroom Door Before     2107 Bedroom Door After2107 Bedroom Door Bonus

I wake up to the Grand Canyon and the St. Louis Arch every morning. The stand full of guitars also let’s you know that I’m an incredibly accomplished musician on Rock Band and Guitar Hero with no real musical talent at all.

2107 Closet Before     2107 Closet After

For being a single guy, I have a ridiculous amount of shoes.

2107 Secret Shelves Before     2107 Secret Shelves After

More square footage the apartment floor plan boasts that isn’t really useable. Unless you count storing a Christmas tree, empty boxes, and the remnants of a Willy Wonka costume as “usable.”

With that, we wrap up the tour of my Charlotte home! I hope you enjoyed the pictures as much as I enjoyed letting the entire Internet know the full layout and contents of my apartment, which is perfectly safe and rational.

If you made it this far, you will now be rewarded with a gratuitous Harper picture.

2107 Puppy

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One Response to MTV Cribs – Charlotte Edition

  1. You are such a single guy…and you so need a girl.

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