If a picture’s worth a thousand words…

I’d love to hear what thousand you choose for this!

What that picture says to me is…

“I have no idea how to write a Best Man’s speech for my brother’s wedding.”

So my brother’s wedding is two weeks from tomorrow. For the most part, it sounds like they’re pretty much done with the hectic planning of unnecessary super important things. Rehearsal meal is planned and invitations are out and coming back in. Catering for the reception is handled. RSVPs are tallied. The timing of the wedding photos is set. Hotel rooms are booked. Even the ultra-super-highly secretive Groom’s cake is accounted for. All that seems to be unsettled in their camp is fine-tuning the playlist for the dance floor.

On my end though, I’m still scrambling. It’s so uncharacteristic of me but it’s true. I’ve been slacking. I just bought my shoes for my suit this past week. I finally bought tickets to the Boston College game last Saturday. I just let the first guy know today when we’re meeting for the game… and even then, I couldn’t answer him when he asked if there was anything he could bring. Because I don’t know whether I can find a grill, need to buy one, or scrap it altogether and just order food to bring with us. Just craziness! He’s calling back Thursday just to get more detailed plans. So here’s to hoping I’ve got it figured out by then! I’m not even entirely sure what I’m going to get them as a wedding present. I had an amazing idea but then I checked out their registry and other guests completely wrecked it. You guys are no fun! Last minute shopping, here I come!

Side note: To be somewhat fair to myself, I do have a surprise up my sleeve for the Bachelor Party Weekend in my possession, as well as my “outfit” for the rehearsal dinner. It’s the important things that matter, right?

The last biggy, though, is the Best Man’s speech for the wedding. I tried starting a month or more ago and all I have to show for it is half a page of nonsense. I’ve tried picking it back up several times only to hit a brick wall. I’m not an extrovert. I don’t beg for the spotlight. But I’m good at making excuses!

Do I go embarrassing… or funny… or sincere? All three, you say? Do I go personal for the few that will get it… or go broad for the many that don’t know us Jerdan boys? Do I keep it short and simple and let people enjoy their evening on their own terms… or spin a loquacious (SAT word alert!) tale to introduce my brother to his newly acquired extended family? I even originally planned on a simple prop start things off and quickly nixed that after rereading my idea. What was I thinking?

I will say this though – I have an entirely new appreciation for any type of screenwriter. What comes across as funny in my head instantly loses its humor when pen pencil meets the paper. And this is for a one time speech given in a few minutes. I can’t imagine how someone crafts a 30 minute sitcom episode, much less an entire movie built around the timing for intended comedy.

It’s also a fine line to walk between “keeping it real” for all of the family members who know the informal me while not completely embarrassing myself and our side of the family to the guests I’ve never met. Be myself… just not quite all of myself!

Did I mention Google didn’t help at all?

At this point, the goal is to simply avoid awkward silences, rotten tomatoes, a cane around the neck, or someone wrestling the mic away from me.

And crickets. Definitely wanting to avoid the crickets.

When all is said and done though, I’m sure I’ll have something I’m proud of and have a blast telling. But more importantly, as long as my brother and his soon-to-be wife enjoy it, that’s all that really counts.

No pressure. I got this!

Maybe 🙂

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3 Responses to If a picture’s worth a thousand words…

  1. You’re thinking too hard. If I can make people laugh at my speeches, (me and my complete lack of humor) you got this down pat, kid. Make bullets on a note card and wing it. Write it down too detailed and you lose the spontaneity. Besides, you won’t see most of these people ever again no matter how it comes off. The Beales/Jerdan/Clark family will enjoy it no matter what.

  2. Aunt Lisa says:

    Follow up … look on face was the same as above (lol) … and speech was great!

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